Babysitting
by goldykat
Summary: Sirius spun around to Harry's crib. "Right Harry, its just you and me then!" He clapped his hands together. "Lily said... that we should start with a book!"
1. Chapter 1

"Its just for tonight, we'll be back tomorrow to pick him up. So, just..." Lily gestured to Harry's tiny book shelf. "Read him a story or something!" She quickly snapped on her earrings. "If anything happens, you know how to contact us, right? If he starts crying, try rocking him. Oh! And feed him at exactly five o'clock, or he'll get cranky. If-"

Sirius waved her off. "Lily, Remus and I can take care or Harry for one night. Go! Enjoy yourselves, god knows how busy you two have been!"

"You can't even take care of _yourself_!" She said distractedly, checking her hair in one of Harry's tiny mirror toys. "Just, don't kill him before Remus gets here!"

"Don't worry, I'm sure he'll be here any minute." Sirius met James's eyes over Lily's head, and then peered out the window at the full moon. They hadn't yet told her that Remus was a Werewolf.

"Okay. Okay." She pursed her lips. "When I come back, I want Harry to be in one piece, understand? No missing fingers or toes."

"I'll contact you in an hour to see if everythings still alright." James said, resetting his watch.

Sirius threw up his hands good naturally. "Doesn't _anyone_ in this house trust me? Now go, we'll be fine!" Sirius had to practically shove Lily into the fireplace. Sirius waved as they disappeared in green flames.

He spun around to Harry's crib. "Right then Harry, its just you and me then!" He clapped his hands together. "Lily said... that we should start with a book!"

Sirius lugged the green eyed monster over to the rocking chair. "Which one should we read, eh?"

"Sir'mus, re'd tawt one!" Harry pointed enthusiastically at a lard book titled _Hogwarts, a History_.

Sirius looked at it, confused. "Why is this book even in your room? I doubt you would understand anything in it." Instead he lifted a much smaller blue book off the shelf. "Lets read this one, okay?"

Harry looked unimpressed, but he snuggled into Sirius's lap more securely, and looked up at him expectantly. Quickly Sirius read through the book silently, so he would know what to expect. What he found made him snort in disgust. Under his breath he said. "I've never heard of a charm powerful enough to put a whole castle to sleep, and why didn't the prince just use a fire spell on the plants?"

"Have you ever read this book before?" When Harry shook his head, Sirius's expression brightened. "Right, we don't need this then!" He dropped the blue book on the floor.

"Now, We'er doing Sleeping Beauty _Sirius style_!" He grinned down at Harry. "Once apon a time, in a huge castle called Hogwarts, there was a beautiful Prefect named Lily. An **evil** wizard named Severus was so jealous of Lily, that he put a curse on her through a potion. Lily drank the potion, and was forever cursed that if she ever touched a...um" Sirius cast about the small room for help.

"A _Hogwarts, a History_ book," He said triumphantly. "She would immediately fall asleep for a thousand years, unless she was kissed by her true love. But luckily a good Prefect came by, his name was Remus, and he was able to counter the curse a little so she would only have to sleep for a hundred years. Anyway, Dumbledoor, the King of the castle made his loyal servant, Peter, store the princess in a beautiful bedroom at the top of one of the very tallest towers."

He cleared his throat and took a sip of his hip flask, talking was dry work. "So one day, the head boy named James was flying around the castle on his amazing broom. The wind that day was very rough, so he decided to take shelter in one of the rooms with open windows. He flew into the window of the tallest tower and instantly fell in love with the women sleeping there."

"Her hair was a firey red and James was so in love with her, he decided to wake her with a kiss. And so he kissed her and she woke up! James was her true love!" He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "So Sirius, James best friend, beat up Severus, and they all lived Happily ever after!"

Sirius bounced his knees up and down. "There Harry, how was that?"  
Harry burbled happily. "Sto'y! Sto'y! Toll aga'n!" Sirius grimaced and pulled another book off the shelf, titled _Beauty and the Beas_t, He speed read it and the dropped it on the floor.

"Sorry bud, I'll tell you this one later, right now its time for you to eat!" Sirius scooped up Harry and carried him down to the kitchen. "Oooh, what did Mommy leave for you?" He poked at the the squashed orange lump sitting on the kitchen table, covered in plastic wrap. "This looks gross, how do you eat anything Lily feeds you?"

Sirius dropped Harry off on his high-chair and pulled a larger chair up in front of it. He balanced the plate of orange goop in one hand as he opened the silver wear drawer with the other he grabbed a tiny blue spoon and closed the drawer with his hip.

He picked up a glob of the goop with the spoon and said loudly "Here comes the Snitch! Zooom!" He zoomed the spoon around in front of Harry. When his mouth opened in awe, Sirius shot the spoon through his a moment Harry chewed thoughtfully, then he spit it up all over Sirius's face.

Sirius tried several more techniques and had little more success, finally he gave up on the food and went to grab a bottle of milk from the refrigerator. He set the milk on the table next to Harry, and removed his wand from his pocket and was about to warm the milk up, when he was interrupted by the sound of someone using the floo network in the other room.

Sirius dropped his wand on the table, and raced to the other room. James's head sat nestled in the flames, waiting for him. James cast a look behind him. "Sorry, I dont have much time, 'Mad-eye' needs to use the floo in a few seconds. Is Harry alright?"

"Harry's fine." Sirius said, wiping a smudge of orange goo from his cheek. "You guys don't have to worry, I've got this under complete control!"

James rolled his eyes. "You said that last time, and we came home to find Harry floating twelve feet above the ground in the backyard." His head spun around on an invisible neck and he spoke to someone over his shoulder, when he turned back, he was smiling. "Sorry, I have to go. Take care of Harry!" The flames drew in on themselves and disappeared, taking James's head with them.

Sirius dug into his pocket for his wand, and relized he had left it on the table next to Harry. Quickly, he raced back to the kitchen, just in time to hear Harry cry 'FLAMO!'


	2. Chapter 2

"Flamo! Flamo! Flamo!" Harry cried, delightedly throwing fire at everything from the tip of Sirius's wand. Harry set the curtains on fire, the food, and the couch. Harry grinned when he saw Sirius and stood up in his chair to face him, pointing the wand directly at his heart. "Fi'e! Fi'e! lak Sir'mus! Fi'e!"

"I can see that." Sirius said calmly, he reached toward his wand. "Can I have that back Harry?"

"No!" Harry screeched. "No! No! T'is mine!" Sirius flinched as he waved the wand erratically at him. Slowly, Sirius took a step forward, closer to the wand.

"Please, Harry?" Sirius pleaded.

Harry looked at him doubtfully. "W'll I goo in t'mes out?"

"What?" Sirius looked abashed "No! I'm not you mother!"

"So I wo't?"

"No," He confirmed "You will not."

"P'omise?" Harry looked unusually serious for a two year old.

"I swear that you wont get in trouble." Sirius smiled at him. "Now, can I have my wand back?"

"No!" Harry cried. Still pointing it a Sirius, he cried "Acio'! Sir'mus!" He'd cried out a summoning charm.

Sirius braced himself for an impact, and as he flew by Harry, he snatched his wand. Flipping his wand up, he managed to catch himself before he crashed through the kitchen window. By now the smoke detector spells were screeching their heads off, and he silenced them as he put out the fires attempting to claim the entire kitchen.

"Harry-" He'd started to growl sernly.

"Y'u p'omised! Y'u p'omised!" Harry yelled, still manging to put on an innocent expression, that James could have never pulled off.

Sirius sighed and draped a hand over his eyes, he HAD promised after all. Instead of yelling he groaned: "Who taught you all those spells?"

Harry looked worried for a moment, what is Sir'mus hurt dada? But he answered him truthfully. "Dada t'ught me!"

"Right. we'll get back at him later, but for right now," Sirius checked his timepiece. "Its time for you to take a nap. So why don't we move to the living room? And you can drink you milk." He scooped up Harry and grabbed the bottle off the table.

In the living room he quickly set the bottle down on the table, and using his wand (holding it far from Harry's reach) he warmed up the milk. After returning his wand to his pocket, Sirius settled Harry in his lap with a bottle.

Harry attacked the milk so ferociously it made Sirius laugh. But when Harry held the empty bottle up for more, Sirius shook his head. "You'll get more after you take your nap." Sirius flicked his wand at the many lights in the room, turning them all off.

fifteen minutes later, when Sirius had finally gotten comfortable enough to fall asleep himself, Harry asked shyly. "Sir'mus? Y'u S'ill aw'ke?"

Sirius barley managed to suppress a groan. "I'm awake." He rubbed Harry's forehead. "What can I do to help you sleep?"

"Sto'y!" Harry said enthusiastically.

"Alright, fine." He tried vainly to remember the story he'd quickly read upstairs. "Once upon a time, there was a young girl named...named..." His mind took him involuntarily to the Order meeting he'd attended last week, which somehow brought him to thinking of the female Order member Minerva McGonagall. "...Named Minerva."

He almost snickered, Remus would have killed him if he ever heard this story. Next he mentioned McGonagall's father figure. "And Minerva had a father, named Dumbledore, and he was a famous wizard. Soone day, Dumbledore was using the floo network to get back to his castle but he pronounced 'Hogwarts Castle' wrong. Instead he ended up at the Lupin castle. There he met and befriended Remus Lupin who accidentally turned into a werewolf right in front of him. Mr. Lupin, the owner of the castle, was furious."

"Mr. Lupin didn't want anyone to know about Remus's condition, so to stop Dumbledore from telling anyone, he locked him in the dungeon. Dumbledore's daughter was extremely worried when she heard about her father, so she snuck into the castle in the dead of night. She tip-toed all the way down to the dungeons and tried to free her father. But the dungeons had safety spells on them that kept anyone from magicking their way out."

"But it when from bad to worse as Dumbledore told her what Remus was, and she realized it was a full moon. So anyways, Remus sniffed them out, and came down to the dungeons. Minerva was horribly afraid, but she loved her father, so she made a deal with Remus. She asked if she could take her father's place in the dungeons." Sirius knew that the real McGonagall would have given her life for her mentor.

"Remus agreed to the deal, and he forced Dumbledore to Apperate. From then on Remus treated Minerva like a princess, giving her the biggest bedroom and the fanciest clothes. The night after Minerva agreed to stay, Remus sent his house elves to invite her to dinner and help her get dressed. Well Minerva was extremely homesick, and she hated Remus for keeping her as a prisoner. So she refused-Hey!" Sirius had looked down to see if Harry was enjoying the story, and realized that he was fast asleep.

Sirius shifted him a little so he would be more comfortable. Then, holding his godson tightly, he let his eyes drift shut.

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How was that? I think there might be only one chapter to go!


	3. Chapter 3

Last chapter! No, seriously. It totally is. Really, I promise....Okay, maybe not.

Lily has a heart of iron. Unlike me. Who had to take several breaks from writing this.

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Sirius woke when Harry was roughly snatched from his arms.

"_What have you done to my kitchen_?" Lily whispered hotly, shoving Harry into James's arms (after checking to make sure he still had all his body parts). She quickly motioned for James to take the baby upstairs, only when she saw he disappear did she start her tirade. "SIRIUS BLACK, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? WHERES REMUS? WHY IS MY KITCHEN SMOLDERING?" She didn't give him a chance to answer. "I SWEAR I'M GOING TO USE THE CRUSIATIS CURE ON YOU, AND WATCH YOU DIE-" Abruptly, a something occurred to her. " Oh my god! Were you attacked by Death Eaters? Did Remus get kidnapped? I should have never left! Was Voldemort here?"

"Er..no, well, see...Harry had my wand and he, er, was waving it-"

"DON'T YOU DARE BLAME THIS ON HARRY!" In the book '_Studies of Muggle Life, First Hand Accounts_' It stated that in all animals, an adult male was the most dangerous. Personally, Sirius believed that a mother protecting her cub was much worse.

At that very moment, an extremely unlucky Remus Apperated into the room. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" Lily screeched at him, right then she was making a face that drew an uncanny resemblance to a wailing banshee.

Remus frowned at her uncertainly. "I just dropped by the Leaky Cauldron for a spot of tea-"

"FOR A SPOT OF TEA?" Lily screamed, as if it were the worse thing in the world. "YOU LEFT HARRY WITH THIS MADMAN, FOR A _CUP OF TEA_!" Lily paused, apparently to flustered to speak.

"What?" Remus asked, looking tired and confused. "I only came over because of the note you sent me!" He waved a scrap of paper under her nose. He imitated her voice: "'_Thanks for babysitting last night, we greatly appreciate it.'_ When did I babysit?"

"What? But Sirius said that you were-" She paused for a moment, thinking, and then she spun around to face Sirius. "YOU!"

"Me?" He said innocently, trying to make himself smaller.

"I bet this was all your idea! Just to prove me wrong for saying you couldn't handle Harry! I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!" She probably would have skinned Sirius right there, if a loud wail hadn't rose from Harry's room. Like his father, Harry had the ability to sense when Sirius needed saving.

All three people rushed up to the bedroom, where Lily descended on Harry's crib like a hawk. "Your alright! Your alright!" She chanted softly, whether to reassure Harry or herself, the men did not know. Cuddling Harry close, she sat down in the chair Sirius had sat in last night. "How 'bout a story? You love stories!" She cooed. "Why don't we read about Hogwarts?" she asked softly as reached for the book siting on top of the bookshelf.

"NOOOO!" Harry screamed, and everyone in the room jumped. Harry grabbed the sleeve of her robe, yanking it away from _Horwarts, a History_. "Don't t'uch!"

Lily looked down at him, bewildered. She'd always read to Harry out of the Hogwarts books, why was he upset _now_? But then it occurred to her and she glanced up at the only man in the room who was avoiding her eyes. _"Out" _she mouthed at Sirius, pointing to the door with her free hand.

"At least let me say good bye." He said softly, holding his arms open to take Harry. Lily only tightened her hold on her child. Ignoring Lily, Sirius bent down and kissed Harry's forehead.

Before he left Sirius whispered in Harry's ear: "_Happy Halloween_."


End file.
